Wednesday, October 27, 2010

As The Spirit Moved Them

As The Spirit Moved Them
I confess been out of write for a point in time. And I realise that the godly handiwork of my output request confess been drowned, in these subsequent days, by the deluge of neo-paganism from my neighbour, the so-called "Archdruid" Eileen. But I confess been unavailable at the Lord's work. And now I am on.

I confess issued a booklet to the members of the Bogwulf Funambulist Baptists. It is - as you would assume, and be obliged to aim - so prescriptive.

Between its commands, are embedded the following:

* Make-up for women. I confess no aim to be draconian. So I would extremely defend women to confess combed their hair and maybe put on some powder. Whilst the powder be obliged to not be a thrilling colour. I stand for lip colour, so zero can see you are appearing in it, lest they be dishonorably intense.
* Scope of skirts for environmentally friendly women. At lowest possible 4 inches in the knee. The central of the knee. Not the top, or root of the knee. Not that I confess any fear in knee.
* Trousers - extremely not. That drive be construed as an fortuitous to wear male clothing. And we know what the Member of the aristocracy thinks of the appearing in of male clothing. At lowest possible, by women. Men appear in it is restore to your liking. Certain, that is what they be obliged to be appear in.
* And as for appearing in an so succinct battle of skirt-like solid, with minimally some unfathomable tights converse - as some environmentally friendly ladies are in the infatuation of appear in - that is sure thing out. Absolutely this crack of dawn in Milton Keynes shopping centre, I saw two women appearing in this nice of clothing. I was so flabbergasted that I followed them for numerous proceedings to assurance face-to-face that my eyes were not put-on me. At last I was assisted by two relief guards, who told me that the environmentally friendly women were unquestionably appearing in such attire, and it would be privileged for me if I bunged support them. They were unquestionably reasonable. Such sights may well confess been venomous to my nucleus.
* Objective action within groveling acts of music (or illustrate acts of esteem): a receptacle scale of corporeal motion is preordained when in performance. All the same vacillation of the hips is bad and tends towards febrile over-excitement of the hormones. Equally one be obliged to recover raising the hands even more manage height. We are not pretty. I mean Charismatics.
* Televisual programming: purely from the BBC, and purely from 6am until 9pm. And purely for correct programmes, and extremely not for Coronation Respect, which I am told (to the same degree I do not watch - see even more) is affirmative a "gay record". Effective formal pious satellite channels, from my "formal list", which I am instantly updating in the light of "Worship Wins" and the most undercurrent failed apocalypses.
* Dancing: You asking? Hence no.
* Decided working environments: everywhere godly. In the selling industry that intermediate places that do not quantity alcohol, solid that my partner Marjory would buy flood (which would have available the "Protection)" or prophylactics, unless the purchasers can verify they are in a consistent connubial relationship.
* Decisions in the home - marriage is a definite. Women are to be trusted to make terrible decisions in their own orbit - such as which vegetables to do with the newspaper interior that the wife has definite, or which day of the week on which to rearrange the sheets, and the best order to hoover the back at the ranch.
* Kinfolk of other faiths (I have available Catholics, Anglicans and Methodists in the sphere of, and members of other, less enlightened, Baptist churches). These people requirement be available the faux pas of their ways by mellow persuasion. Frequently this mellow persuasion be obliged to be carried out by noise at them throw down megaphones in Dunstable shopping centre. Do not contemplate lighter matters with them - if you requirement work with these fiends, as well as game reserve the substitute uncompromisingly to the matters at hand and as well as disseminate in your working function.

Ah, brothers and sisters, it is significant, is it not, to endure in the Authorization of the Spirit?